What can you do when you have done all the good and right things you know to do, and your life still does not seem to have changed for the better? Sometimes life seems to have insurmountable or unending difficulties. You do your best and it doesn’t seem to be enough. You follow all the rules, go to classes, have counseling sessions, attend workshops, listen to self-help tapes, read books, and yet there are still difficulties.
Is this beginning to have a ring of familiarity? The reason it does, is because we all signed up for the same school; So, we’re reading the same books, and learning the same lessons. Oh, some of the details and timing may be different for each of us, but we all face similar trials and events in life that challenge us in similar ways.
Sometimes you see others whose lives seem to be charmed and blessed, and wonder why you aren’t like them. But the fact is that if you do know someone whose life IS like that, it is because they have probably already gone through the classes on those subjects, and paid the dues sometime, somewhere. But more often than not, what may appear to be a charmed life in one respect, has limitations in others. It is a rare soul who has completed all the coursework, done the homework, and is waiting to graduate. Of course they exist.
There are Answers
But what about the rest of the “good people?” Those who are trying so hard, and yet still seem to have one challenge hit them after another. Take some comfort because first of all, you are not alone, and secondly there is a way out. Yes, there are things you can do that will make a difference in your life–if you have the courage and commitment to do them. I’m talking about something broader and deeper than self-help books, subliminal tapes, going to workshops, or anything else in the human potential movement, but first let’s look at the source of the problem.
Virtually everyone has asked themselves, “Why is this happening to me?” Sometimes a person can feel quite frustrated and depressed over situations, especially when they have gone on for prolonged periods. You ask, ”Why me?” “Why the financial problems?” “Why the relationship problems?” “Why the health problems?” First of all, it is important to know that the universe does operate according laws, and there are no mistakes in life, only learning experiences. So when a physical, mental or emotional pain comes into your life, the approach should not be inward or outward blame, but rather a turning inward to discover how you can take the experience and move it from being empty suffering to meaningful stepping stones to new or better ways.
The way out is not through coping skills—It is through transformations of consciousness that not only change the way you react to life, but also the nature and quality of your life itself.
The Spirals of Life
Even though your life sometimes may seem to be going in circles, it actually isn’t. What you are experiencing is a slow upward spiral in which you are gradually gaining in knowledge, wisdom and understanding. Just because you have addressed particular issues doesn’t mean that issue will immediately go away. It may change form and present itself a number of times; each time teaching you a different aspect about the thoughts and energies you have unconsciously put out to create it.
You see, as you rise on the spiral of your life, each time you come around the spiral, you are directly above a spot where you were on your spiral at a previous time. This means that the same issues that have been giving you difficulties in the past (or present) will present themselves to you again, unless or until you have learned sufficiently to be completely above their influence. Life presents you with the same situation over and over, not only so you can learn all there is to learn from it, but also to confirm to you that you have indeed dealt with it in the most beneficial way. Once you have completely moved in consciousness above a certain type of situation, you will not experience that situation again.
Our Life Mission
But why are you or those you love in troublesome situations now? Your life is composed of the energy patterns that you have given your attention to in the past. Today is borne out of the thoughts, beliefs, and feelings of yesterday, and tomorrow arises from the thoughts of today. In his classic book, Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill called this “a secret” successful people have discovered. You may have established very strong patterns for yourself in the past that are now being experienced as adversity and challenge. While you might think you would prefer to choose a life of perfect harmony, it may not be the overriding goal of your soul for this moment in your life. Your own soul is working out a balancing and refining process, that will lead to greater harmony, but the script you are following may take you through strong challenges to get you to that place. In fact, sometimes the souls who are quite advanced preprogram their lives with challenges and difficulties so they can clear out the final issues in the quickest possible way. It is important not to judge yourself or others because you see suffering or difficulties—sometimes severe. Know that each soul chooses its path to work out what is important for them to learn, and balance.
If you see life as a continuum you will realize that your life is following an extended path of evolving to higher states of being. Your evolution is based on your reactions and intent. How you react to your circumstances is far more vitally important to your continuing growth, than the specific circumstance you find yourself in. For instance, if you find that your current situation is disadvantaged, or you have been taken advantage of, and you respond by holding anger, resentment, hatred, and thoughts of revenge, you are not only missing the lessons those circumstances have for you, but you have reinforced the very factors that contribute to continued suffering.The very strong negative nature of those feelings will only hurt you, and perpetuate repeating similar patterns or circumstances in your future.
Every Action has a Reaction
You should do what is necessary physically to protect yourself, release any negative attachments to those who have hurt you, and thank yourself for having the insight to learn from the circumstance. The lesson is to learn to release them with forgiveness, even if life has been cruel to you. It takes a high level of perception to feel and express this attitude from the heart, but it is the place you must come to be, if you are going to attain the life goals you want.
Most people miss many opportunities every day to further themselves because they cannot let go. Yet, they wonder why their lives continue repeating the same patterns—perhaps with different people playing similar roles in their lives. They will stay trapped in these self-created loops until they figure out they need to refine their own soul qualities, rise above the mass consciousness, and keep focused on the vision of what lies beyond their circumstances. Forgive, release, let go, be free of negative thoughts of others, and you will be moving out of the causes of limiting circumstances. If your reading fast, slow down and read that last sentence again.
Your Life as a Movie Star
If you see your specific life circumstances in the context of a long movie in which you are playing many roles, and changing costumes, you will realize that how you respond to the situations, sets the stage for the next. You made certain soul contracts for some to play the villains in your life in order to help you learn the valuable lessons you need. Each major challenge that you would face in your life is what you know you need to take you to your next level of growth—and your next level of growth is determined by how completely you have surrendered the problem. You are not judged by your actions, as much as your reactions—primarily your feelings.
The actor and comedian Jim Carrey said in an interview on the Larry King Live TV Show, “I believe that everything that happens to you is the greatest thing that could ever happen to you. Everything…because that is exactly how the universe works. It gives you whatever you are in alignment with and it’s all designed to work on the weakest link you have.”
This is the type of profound insight that only comes from observing life over time, and I believe it is one of the most important insights a person could come to. All aspects of one’s life must be balanced and a soul will do whatever is necessary to create that balance.
Each experience helps the soul develop and refine itself as it moves onward in its expression. Eventually, all the bad will drop away, and the soul will express itself only with the very highest qualities. You can accelerate this process by becoming aware of the nature of existence, and taking all the steps necessary to respond to life with the purest motivations and love.
So if you have been struggling with difficulties, wondering why your efforts have not seemed to produce the results you want, it may not be the fault of anyone or anything. This does not mean that it must continue. You must look at each condition in your life, and analyze your attitude toward it and your reaction toward it. If it is anything less than love and acceptance in the deepest and purest way, then you have not learned all there is to learn from that particular type of situation.
Any outward searching or using tools at your disposal in the form of counseling, workshops, books, retreats, audio programs, and articles can help you focus on where you are, but they cannot make the transformations for you. They are only the tools that must lead to the inner work. Yes, sometimes it seems so very difficult, maybe even impossible, but it isn’t. The circumstances are there to motivate you to look deeply within and surrender your resistance and reactions. You have to reach deep inside for the strength that resides there, and renew and resolve to KEEP YOUR FOCUS ON YOUR SOUL AND SPIRIT AND NOT OUTWARD CONDITIONS.
I have been up and I have been down, and I’ve learned the way out is the way in—looking into yourself to see yourself clearly, to analyze your attitudes and reactions to each situation, and to purify your motives and responses.
To follow this path requires a process of meditation, clearing, and commitment to living a pure and respectful life.
