Serenity means you feel peaceful, calm, tranquil, and at ease especially when there is turmoil going on around you, Everybody wants to live in serenity and inner peace but few actually understand how.
I was with a group of about 50 people at a retreat and asked them what they wanted the most.
I know that sounds kind of like the genie coming out of the lamp and saying he’ll grant you your wishes.
Now, you’d think most people would ask for more money, more love, or a new house or car, but what the group asked for the most was serenity and inner peace.
I know that may surprise you, but serenity and inner peace besides being desired also seems to be the most elusive.
Serenity and Inner peace are states of deep inner calmness without struggling, suffering, or mental disturbances regardless of anything external.
Many philosophers and spiritual teachers have described serenity and inner peace as the most important aspect of life, and the only way to feel genuinely happy and successful.
With some simple practices you can find this serene sense of inner peace even when faced with conditions causing others to feel stress and anxiety.
Serenity comes from the Latin word “serenus,” which means clear or unclouded. This implies that quieting the mind is a basic and important part of arriving at serenity. When you’ve mastered serenity you’ll stay true to yourself and not let your surroundings negatively impact your peaceful state.
8 Signs You Struggle with Serenity
and Inner Peace
1. Your mind is always racing
2. You compare yourself to others
3. You find it difficult to say no
4. Little troubles become big troubles
5. Your to-do-list is overwhelming
6. Your home and work environment are disorganized
7. You procrastinate often
8. You fret over things you can’t control
Besides feeling good serenity makes you better equipped to handle life. You become more adept at handling problems and challenges. In time you will find that something which seemed like a massive catastrophe is actually a relatively smaller issue, and certainly not one worth wasting your time struggling with or giving up your inner peace over.
How Do You Become a Serene Person?
To become a serene person and live a life of serenity, you must recondition your reactive mind and build positive mental habits to create a peaceful mind.
There are many ways to arrive at a feeling of inner peace and serenity, and with practice over time you will be able to experience it automatically all the time.
Unless your mind is at peace your body and emotions won’t be at peace, so let’s start with your mind.
How To Calm Your Restless Mind
Having a restless mind destroys your focus and concentration, and can cause many a sleepless nights. A restless mind also drains you of your lifeforce energy so you can feel fatigued much of the time. Then, when it’s time to meditate or sleep, your over-active mind won’t turn off without some effort.
In many ways you’ve taught your mind to be active. How you were trained in school contributed to it. What is required of you in the workplace also contributed to it, and then there’s the media projecting so much at you all the time that you find your mind jumping from one thing to another every few seconds.
When your restless mind becomes overtaxed you can feel anxious. Anxiety takes more of your lifeforce energy. Your heart may speed up and your muscles tense, and you’ll feel helpless to turn it off.
The restless mind can absolutely be made calm, but like most hard paths, it takes practice but is well worth it. When you are relaxed everything is better. You will be able to make better decisions because you won’t be so confused or operating in survival mode.
Cognitive Distancing
Your restless mind is actually trying to protect you. It is trying to warn you of what it thinks might be future dangers, but it usually exaggerates. This is sometimes called Catastrophizing or Cognitive Distortion. You’ve probably heard the idiom “Don’t make a mountain out of a molehill.” The ego-mind is an expert at doing that.
A cognitive distortion is an exaggerated or irrational thought pattern involved in the perpetuation of psychological states such as depression and anxiety.
A way to address this tendency is to challenge the belief. Step back and think about facts. How likely is it that the thing you fear will happen? What can you do to prevent it? Take a deep breath, step back and make a fact-based plan.
Focus on the Moment & Practice Mindfulness
Focusing on the moment is a mindfulness practice that teaches you to get out of your head, out of the past, and out of the future. The restless mind indulges in all kind of horror fantasies that are not based on reality or the task at hand.
If you focus on the moment, your mind gains tangible facts and details with which to construct your reactions. Your mind will be unable to lose itself in worry if you are focused on something constructive and positive such as a conversation, delicious meal, or game for instance.
Here is one way to help you be present in the moment.
Say to yourself, “I call all of my energy into present time. Right here and right now. I release and let go of everything that is not true in this moment.”
Typically, the mind will want to drift to something from the past or project worry on the future. As you repeat the intention I just suggested it will momentarily pull your attention into present time. When your mind starts to drift repeat the statement.
Your Source of Serenity
To find true serenity, you need to be mindful of your emotions, actions, and thoughts. You can train yourself to become very conscious about what you say, how you act, how you feel, and what you think.
This requires self-observation and it will help you understand yourself better. As you pay more attention to your intentions you will get to know yourself on a deeper level.
Mindfulness, starts mostly in your head as a mental practice. Mindfulness, though, does not merely take place in our head. In fact, it is a diversion away from mental activity and it is a practice that brings you out of your head and mind, and takes you into being present in the moment with everything you notice.
Yoga and Tai Chi can be useful in training your mind to be more mindful. These physical activities will bring you into your body and out of your head, but they will also teach you to develop the mindset of mindfully doing your practice. You don’t have to let your thoughts control you and you don’t ever need to find a prison inside of your own mind. It’s your mind. You have the key to it!
Being mindful will help you have more compassion on yourself and others.
Compassion is something that you should extend to yourself as well as to others. Reduce self-critical voices and judgments. Be kind to yourself and tap into your inner joyfulness. This will lead you to live a serene life and integrate serenity into your personality.
I have a free e-book on the subject of mindfulness with a meditation script to help you with this. Here is the link: Mindfulness – Be Empowered by Being Present
As you continue with this practice over the weeks you’ll find your mind stays in the present moment longer each time you make the request. Eventually, you’ll stay there all the time, automatically.
Take Action
Have you heard the saying, “An idle mind is the Devil’s playground?” Well, there’s nothing worse for a restless mind than sitting around and not engaging in anything. By occupying the mind with topics that induce serenity and peacefulness you’ll be giving the mind something to put attention on that is positive. For this I suggest anything tranquil or funny. You wouldn’t want the mind to be occupied with anything requiring a lot of analysis or resolution. Pick things that are amusing or serene. You can use creative visualizations for this or watching funny movies.
Don’t Indulge Useless Thoughts
Just because a thought is factual doesn’t mean that it is useful—at least not all the time. Your mind is continually working to figure things out and fix things. Often it keeps going over the same information in an attempt to make sense of what it doesn’t understand or bring resolution to an interaction or relationship issue.
The mind erroneously believes that if it keeps thinking about something the conditions will improve and it will feel more resolved and safe. This is the mind trying to fix what lies outside of it’s ability to fix.
For instance, if you no longer have access to the person with whom there is something unresolved, then no matter how much your mind thinks, analyzes, and ponders the situation it will not resolve it. This often happens with events from childhood.
Your mind identifies something troublesome and then grinds away on it trying to make a plan and take action, but what do you do if the situation and people are no longer available?
In those cases, the only thing to do is release the thoughts and let go of the need to resolve the issue. Often self-forgiveness is helpful, or forgiving the others involved can free you. [Free e-book: Freedom Through Forgiveness]
There is a myriad of useless thoughts in which people often indulge. “Does this person like me enough? Am I doing the right job? Will my car break down?” These are vague worries that do not help you. Catch yourself when you find your mind running down those tracks and bring them to a halt.
There is a simple thought stopping technique that can give you a few moments to gather your wits and release the obsessive thinking. The thought stopping technique is to yell in your mind (not out loud) the word “Stop!” This will usually cause the mind to pause for a short time so you can formulate another method to eliminate the overactive thinking.
Step Back and Think
Re-evaluation is important for progress. If you don’t step back to think every now and then, your mind will keep doing the same things over and over. Insanity, as they say, is doing the same things and expecting different results. So, step back for a minute and get a new perspective. Ask yourself, will this matter in 5 years? If not, let it go.
Meditation is the Best Way to Calm the Wandering Mind
Meditation allows you to let go of the trauma and negative self-talk that follows you throughout the day by clearing the cloudy mind.
An important aspect of meditation is simply taking time to calm your mind and let go of all thoughts for a few minutes in order to become present and observe your surroundings. It allows you to feel less overwhelmed when negative emotions arise and not let emotional disturbances impact your life.
Meditation allows you to be mentally strong and maintain a sense of inner peace and serenity throughout your day, regardless of the stressors that come about. When you sit with these emotions and thoughts and are able to observe them, you can make important realizations about yourself that allow you to understand who you truly are.
Practicing acceptance is a byproduct of meditating. Acceptance enables you to experience constant serenity throughout your daily life. By accepting the curve-balls that life may throw at you, you will no longer let things bother you as much as you have in the past.
Accepting uncertainty and understanding that you cannot predict the future or change the past allows you to feel present in the moment and let go of the wandering thoughts. Finding a sense of acceptance for what is and what will be allows you to be more alert and focused on what is in front of you while feeling calm and unbothered.
I have numerous audio programs to help you release yourself from your controlling and negative thinking. Such as Let Go of the Past, Heal from Past Relationships, Eliminate Fear, Anger & Guilt. Heal your Childhood Wounds, Freedom from Anxiety and others. You’ll find them here: Release Your Past
